Wednesday, May 19, 2010

*I found this article by Alexa Pearson; to be very interesting (it brought a smile to my face too). Attached is the script and the web link to the article. I am hopeful you will enjoy the reading. - Gary D. Masters*

Till Death do us Part - Really? by Alexa Pearson

“Not so much” is my wounded response…and I’ll say it twice (divorced twice, remember?).

Am I bitter and cynical? No, I am pathologically optimistic that a “Master of the Universe” will be brave enough to be my companion (the kind of bravery it takes to drop a rhino at 20 paces with a dart gun, I’m certain). The kicker for me: be brave enough to f*@k my own fear around being vulnerable and walk this wizard into my shadows. (Note: I’m not talking about magical thinking-that’s dangerous sh*t for women; it can easily create an engagement out of a casual dating situation-scary.)

Both times I headed down matrimonial paths, I failed and failed miserably. I wonder if getting married in Vegas had anything to do with it?

*Note to all the cute (it helps), sweaty (cuz you’re probably overdressed messes), nervous boys about to propose to the object of their affection: don’t get married in Sin City. Unassuming guests and family (including the bride) will get way too drunk, hung over, broke and pissed (also in the English sense of the word); that’s merely in the first few hours.

But I digress. So… what the hell? Is marriage a natural state? Are we genetically coded to jump from relationship to relationship, seeking in vain, the ever-elusive, dynamic trifecta: intimacy, love/attraction and companionship, ultimately resulting in marriage, a committed, monogamous relationship or heartbreak? That was a f*@k’n mouthful.

Is it actually possible to find a “soul mate”? A person we are so wild about that we would eagerly share both a bathroom and a bank account (actually, I can’t share either, so based on my own criteria, I will never have a soul mate. Note: I need new criteria).

Conversely, is it separate houses with a “hoochie hut” in the middle that keeps you together? You know, a hoochie hut: bedroom or house between your distinct living spaces where you meet for naked, hot, sticky throw-downs fueled by kahlua-based moonshine (helps with the sticky part).

So what is it? What keeps you together as a couple? As long as you are real and unafraid to speak your truth, I want to hear from you-anonymously, if you can’t stomach it.

My advice: Love and love big! Buy and wear great jewelry (I’m talkin’ gaudy engagement rings), but just don’t walk down the aisle, unless you’ve seen a kick-ass therapist, done the work and then done it again. And don’t forget to get a “Power of Attorney” signed, giving your best friend permission to take you to an undisclosed location and beat you senseless.

On the other hand, you could just forget it all and fly to Vegas. I hear Treasure Island has a great chapel… ask for the Diamond Package.